Just be held!

 

"Hold it all together
Everybody needs you strong
But life hits you out of nowhere
And barely leaves you holding on

And when you’re tired of fighting
Chained by your control
There’s freedom in surrender
Lay it down and let it go"

 

I remember when I first heard those words.  I was driving to one of my many doctors appointments, when the song started to play on the radio.  The words hit me out of nowhere, and I just started to cry right there in the car. 

 

It had been a tough week.  I had been going through a flare, my energy was way down, and I was feeling so guilty.  Where did the guilt come from, you ask?  That was a low point in my life because I did not feel that I was being the parent that I should be.  My kids did not ask for a sick mother.  I was worried about how and what they thought of me.

 

Then this part of the song started to play:

 

"So when you’re on your knees and answers seem so far away
You’re not alone, stop holding on and just be held
Your world’s not falling apart, it’s falling into place
I’m on the throne, stop holding on and just be held
Just be held, just be held"

 

You cannot possibly imagine the piece that came over me.  By that time I had arrived at my doctor's office.  I sat in the parking lot for a few minutes and just wept in the car.

 

 

Through this song, God reminded me that I have to let go of my trials on a daily basis and let God hold me.  He knows the plan for my life.  He wrote my story from beginning to end.  I have to let go and let God lead me through the storms that I am facing, the constant tests, the chronic pain and illness...... trusting him to get me to the other side....

 

 

 "And not a tear is wasted
In time, you’ll understand
I’m painting beauty with the ashes
Your life is in My hands"

 

I’ve got to understand that I’m already in His hands. I’m already being held and I’m already in His control and in His protection, even in the chaos. This song, to me, reminds me that I am being held by Him. As crazy as it is when I look around me, and go from day to day, I’ve got to rest in that truth.”

 

 

Lift your hands, lift your eyes
In the storm is where you’ll find Me

 

Now I understand how Paul and all the captain and crew felt in that boat in Acts 27, having been in a storm that seemed like it was never going to end.  In the midst of the storm, the boat fell apart around them, and they were trying to grab hold of anything they could think of to save themselves.  Only God could carry them safely to shore.  They had to let go of their plan, and let God hold them.